Give it a try….will you succeed 

Here are a few things that I don’t realize are strange as hell yet I do them day to day, not out of necessity, just because when I do them and explain them to people they should give it a try,  they first think I’m an idiot, sure enough every time I tell them I either see them or hear from them and they’ve tried them and it screwed with there head.

#1-opening the doorway to the beyond- next time you’re sitting in a room stare at an open corner of the room, like I mean really stare, focus every part of you into the very center of the corner. Now if you focus hard enough the wall will begin to open, now I understand what’s happening, but the moment it does you’re brain needs to take a double take and it will close. 

I swear I’m not crazy hahahaha.

#2-word picking- now this one doesn’t necessarily messes with you’re mind as it does with others. Next time you’re having a conversation with someone, you may start to notice that they use a certain filler word a lot, once you’ve found the word every time they say it just nod or smile, any form of positive affirmation will do. Funny thing is when you start doing it they start saying the word none stop it’s quite funny, I’ve done it for months to some people, here’s the kicker if you change it to negative they get real defensive, like I mean super quick. 

#3-man you a stalker- next time you’re out in public and about to yawn get ready because you Have to be quick, the moment you yawn quickly look around and see if anyone yawns. There is this sudden moment of internal hysterical laughter followed but an intense moment of WTF, like why the hell were they looking at me, is it because I’m looking good today or am I looking abit weird, probably the weirdness, hahahaha.

#4- hey look at me- now this one is similar to number three but is a bit harder for some, once again while you’re in public but this involves a sneeze, now my partner can a test to this because I do it so frequently see looks as well. The moment you sneeze you need to turn up the volume to eleven, like I mean nearly blow your face off and when it goes off it’s almost like a bomb. Watch everyone freak out, I did it once and a guy fell over, well worth a try.


Classical madness

One press, just one press and you are transported to an amphitheater, before you stands waiting a full orchestra just there for you, you look around and there is no other members of the audience. A private concert begins with the tap of the conductors might staff of control, the strings start to vibrate soothing your soul as they build and build, a slight drum builds in the background tapping at the door to enter this extravagant sound scape. Both sounds meeting in a crescendo that vibrates you to your core, the room goes silent as a singular violin plays a mellow tune as something begins to press hard to your back, but as the rest of the orchestra builds back but you shrug it off as nothing. Minutes flow by as the music guides you down a stream of tranquility, bang a sharp pain strikes you in the back you look around and see nothing you turn back to the orchestra to blend back into the bliss of sound, bang bang, it happens again and again, each time you turn and see nothing, with each kick, it gets harder and harder to focus on the scene before you. As time pass the jabbing  gets harder and harder, you begin to scratch at your skin, the irritation and frustration builds and builds, minutes turn to hours, why are you doing this just stand and walk out, “no,I have a purpose” you scream. After time begins to blur together you are now a melted mess in you chair, longer more and more for this to be over, all of a sudden you look to the stage, a person stands there cloaked in darkness, were they always there, how are they just standing there while I’m in the agony. The light fade to black, a solitary spot light snaps on and focuses specifically on this person, silence fills the room in anticipation.



“Hello, this is Greg from technical support, how may I help you.” He says

You can now die in peace. 

Oww crap I’m a full blown geek!

Before we get into the brunt of the info, yes I am a geek and not just any geek. I read comics and watch there live action adaptions, played games since the beginning of the franchise and gone to midnight launches to play those games as quick as possible. Above all else Star Wars is in my blood, for Christ’s sake when I was 8 years old while everyone was ringing the new millennium waiting for the planes to fall (lol) after midnight, the oldies still drinking like fish I went into the play room and watched a new hope from start to finish (mind you it was the shitty remaster, because no one understood it’s nothing like the original and bought me a new hope on VHS for Christmas). So when I got called a geek or a nerd I said a firm hard “yes, am i” and didn’t care all that much because everyone is technically a geek or a nerd. This is where we get into the heart of the story, when I heard that people played d&d (or dungeons and dragons to normal people) I thought they were that higher level of nerd, the kind that sits in a basement playing make believe and blow up when their dm(dungeon master) is being a power hungry dick. In this moment I said that I would never stoop that low, but I digress this d&d is not a game it is a drug, it’s like cocaine some people use it and go Im only gonna do it once in a while, but for a select few it becomes and addiction. For those of you who don’t know what d&d is first off how do you not know what it is, like come on google it and see how long it’s been around for, seriously
 I’ll wait…….

See it’s a game that’s 34years old and you think a game that has been around for that long you think it has some kind of draw. Second it’s a role playing game, you make a character and explore a world laid out by the dm and make roles to either succeed or fail at everything you wish to do. Now you’re thinking that sounds pretty boring, well technically on paper it is, but what makes the game is the people. Never in my life have I meet a group of people that a more welcoming and so eager to teach, the first time I played my character died in the first session and I never truly went back. After a bit of time away the game drew me back in and I begun to play with this new group with a very large number of people each with personalities that clash in many ways but the moment the Dm begins to intro the moods change, a person who is a store manager by day is all of sudden changed into a brick shit house with a hammer that could crush you like a tin can, but the thing that draws you in is that you don’t have to be a master of impressions or know the rules like the back of you’re hand, you only put in what you want to put in and you have a front seat to an epic adventure. There are draw backs though, character deaths, to those of you that it’s happened to you know what I’m talking about for those of you who haven’t, it sucks, no it fucking sucks, when you have this character that you’ve been playing for months, it begins to be a part of you and you sit there and have them cleaved in half by a sword, swallowed whole by a dragon or even accidentally killed by your party. There is this deep feeling of lose and never have I played a game that almost has me in tears begging for them to come back, to take it back, you go through the stages of grief for this mere sheet of paper, this figment of your imagination. If told my younger self that I’d be playing d&d I tell you, you’d be laughing and walk away. But now I’d recommend to everyone I even Hey have my partner playing and she caught the bug. 
I have entered the next stage of geekdom all I’m trying to do is drag you down with me mwah ha ha ha 

The CUBE-Queen Berry: The Pie is a Lie #4

The CUBE-Queen Berry: The Pie is a Lie #4

A cold snap flows through the Queens’ head as she watches Jeremey’s blood fill the floor, “why oh why did you have to bring your son into this, oh well looks like I’m going to have to change plans” the mysterious man chuckled as he slowly pulled his sword from Jeremey’s stomach. The hooded man smiled as pulled up his sword and begun to clean the blade with the bottom of his cloak laughing to himself, the Queen starred deep into the shroud of his face, “why so glum are you trying to curse me, well too bad for you, my spell transformed you into, what would you call it, oh it’s on the tip of my tongue, dammit this is going to kill me, oh that’s right a turtle, and last time I checked turtles can’t speak” the hooded man said as he kicked the unconscious Jeremey to the ground. the Queen rushed over to her son and pulled him close, pushing hard on his wound as an attempt to stop the bleeding, small tears in her eyes begin to trickle down as  she stares at Jeremey’s face, he stares back at the Queen, reaches out his hand and touching her face “I’m sorry” he says as the last few moments of his life slips through his fingers. Jeremey is now lifeless in the Queens’ arms, a thick glaze of tears rolls down her face as she stares at the hooded man, “WHY” she screams in her head, but to her disbelief the hooded man is just standing there laughing, “Oww this is fun” he snickered, the hooded man begins to twist his hands back and forth as he mutters something under his breath, the Queen feels something on her face. Jeremey’s hand reaches up and strokes the Queens face “I’m sorry” he says as death once again consumes him. The Queen is now filled with terror, as the hooded man once again begins to twist his hands, “I could do this all day” he laughed, the hooded man brings Jeremey back to life over and over as the Queen must sit there and watch as her son dies over and over in her arms, each time harder to bear than the last. “well i think that’s enough fun for today” the hooded man sighs, he  begins to raise his hands and make a symbol with his fingers, a bright white light begins to consume Jeremey and in an instant he is gone, “don’t worry he won’t die, I’ve got plans that I can’t frankly be bothered changing so ill just keep him alive until they’re done, hmmm maybe ill drop him off the castle walls or even better faze him into the walls, so many options so much time” the hooded man says as he lifts all the blood out of the floor with a quick flick of the wrist. the hooded man squats before the Queen examining all of her features, pulling open her mouth, pulling back her eyelids “hmmm quite a good job I’ve done here, but once again I still can’t change people’s eyes, I’ve really gotta get on that, oh well” he said, the Queen now frozen with fear begins to move her claws from under the hooded man’s legs, with one quick strike she scratches at his face, scratching over and over, each claw going deeper and deeper into his face, the Queen is now filled with a white hot rage, “For Jeremey” she screamed  pushing the hooded man to the ground and begins beating on his head, the cold mist of blood spraying in her face. The hooded man now lays there, lifeless, carved open like a freshly skinned cow, the Queen stares down at her claws and the sudden realization of what she had down washed over her, the color drained from her skin as the Queen pushed herself away and coward in the corner. The Queen sat there covering her eyes in fear, then a soft clapping sound begins from across the room, as she pulled her hands down her face was met with sheer terror, the Hooded man’s once lifeless body was now clapping, a soft laughter begun to change to a hysteric burst as he jumped to his feet “well done, well done, I like the new you, so feral, so violent and what a pity, I was going to tell you how I changed you and who I was but after you scratched my beautiful face, I’m upset” he smirked as he wiped a fake tear from his face. “Well after that I frankly need to go have some fun with the rest of your family,” he said as he looked towards the Queen and with the flick of his wrist his once beaten and mishappened head was again covered in darkness and shrouded by his cloak, “oh and one last thing, enjoy the fall…… GUARDS THE BEAST IS ESCAPING!” the Hooded man screamed as he raised his leg and kicked the Queen through the wall, CRASH, the Queen was now falling off the side of the mountain top castle, the wind racing past her head, everything flying towards her, Splash, the Queen once Again is consumed by the darkness.

End of Part 4

Fundamental problem with Religion

Written in 2008-

Before I get into this post just a few things I’d like to clarify, this was written when I was 17, during this time I was attending a private school and studying religion. To be c honest my family is a Christian household but with the influence of my grandmother that adapted many things from multiple different belief structures completely I had a very open mind towards other religions but in the long run, don’t classify myself as a very religious person.

By me writing this I am not trying to cause any offence towards any social group nor use this to put any other religious group above any other, these writings are pure speculation and thoughts on pros and cons in multiple sects of religious living, so don’t start sending threats just take these thoughts as they are and leave it at that.

Today we were asked to put forward or thoughts on different religions, we were asked to come to the front of the class and write our thoughts on the board, so that we could see the differing opinions of different beliefs, from the way the teacher took my contributions to the class, I DON’T THINK HE LIKES THE WAY I THINK, so with that here is the things I wrote on the board:

  • Christianity– you are told not to sin because upon death you face divine judgment and upon the end of the judgement you will either spend all eternity in the light of heaven or burn in the fire of hell, but due to the ever-changing lifestyle of the human race almost everything is classified as a sin these days and it’s almost impossible not to piss off god even though he himself sins more than all of us, he’s a little pervy. But from the core beliefs of Christianity if one does run over a person whilst kissing his neighbor’s wife whilst in a stolen car, as long as you repent your sins you are forever forgiven in the eyes of god, so heaven must be a pretty shitty place.
  • Islam– has the same end game as Christianity but they don’t believe in having priests because it is against the virtues of the one true god, but the big issues are some of the things they condemn as sins are very archaic, if one wishes to eat something they must check if it is purer than silk, we can not devote ourselves to worldly figures of high stature meaning no superheroes. but if one even opens one’s self to the beliefs of any other religion, its a straight shot to hell.
  • Hinduism– the way we live life is then judged in the end and we are either rewarded or punished for the life we had led, they also believe that all living things have souls and depending on how good or bad we are the higher or lower we move on the ladder of rebirth. For example, you’re good you move towards a higher plain of existence depending on whether this is your first or second good life but if you’re bad you move down and will become some form of animal. So therefore the burger i just ate could have been one of my relatives.
  • Buddhism– has the same belief structure as Hinduism, you do well your next life will be good, do bad and your next life will be bad. Besides this in the Tibetan side of Buddhism it is believed that people who do bad things are still being controlled by the animalistic tendencies of their previous life and have no way to change them, so therefore if I do bad there is nothing I can do because the dog in me won’t piss off until I die.

The teacher asked me why I have no faith and would choose to try and be funny at the cost of insulting the beliefs of millions of people, I then responded with “Dogma, if god came down and said to you everything you know about faith is wrong then by your Faith, you would believe him”.

a wise man once said “It’s not about who’s right or wrong. No denomination’s nailed it yet, because they’re all too self-righteous to realize that it doesn’t matter what you have faith in, just that you have faith. Your hearts are in the right place, but your brains gotta to wake up.”- Kevin Smith-Dogma(1999)

The CUBE-Queen Berry:The Pie is a Lie #3

The CUBE-Queen Berry:The Pie is a Lie #3

Footsteps patter in the distance and begin to come closer as the Queen slowly regains consciousness her mind begins to circle and itch in her skull, “what is happening to me, what has done this to me?” she thinks, her claws scratch the stone on the floor as she begins to push herself up from the ground. A strong wish begins to slide over her with a great hesitation “hey, what do I look like” she said to the guard on watch, but with no response she begins to ask over and over with each word growing more higher than the last, the Queen is now screaming over and over “WHAT AM I”, her words fall on deaf ears. The guard turns and stares at the Queen he begins to yell “What are y….”, “NO TALKING TO THE BEAST” a voice shouts from down the hall, who was this voice she thought, why are they so hesitant to talk to me she pondered. With no help from the outside world the Queen searches for a way to see the beast she had become, she grabs her food bowl and begins to look for water, with her eyesight still blurry the Queen begins to scourer the cell, but her eyesight begins to fight her with every moment trying to focus the more her eyes begin to sting and burn, the Queen falls to her knees with her sight failing more and more with each passing second all hope was beginning to disappear with it, as she dragged her way towards her bed,a distant thud echoed over and over, as the Queen focused on the noise it started to become clearer, the roof in the cell next to her was dripping from the ceiling. The Queen inches over to the cell wall bowl in hand, she begins to push the bowl between the bars to collect the water, she places the bowl on the ground to save her strength and sits up watching the bowl slowly filling, with each drop of water that falls into the bowl more and more fear  fills the Queen’s mind, the Questions begin to swell in , do i want to see?, what if I can’t handle it?, am i truly a monster?, each question beginning to scratch and itch inside her skull, each drop begins to sting like arrows madness begins to creep in. Hours pass the Queen is now rocking back and forth, clutching her face muttering under her breath, with all these thoughts of doubt and fear rolling in hear mind, her sanity is begining to fade but from within the depths of her mind a song is beginning to rise, this song was sung to her as a child and she sang it to her children, the queen began to hum repeating the song over and over, with each completion the world begins to return to her. BANG, the queen is snapped out of her trance by the door being smack by a sword it was Jeremey he had been watching her for a few hours now, Jeremy opens the door and enters , the Queen rushes to the back of the cell in fear, “Talk” Jeremey yells with sword in hand, “it’s me” she replies crying with every muttered word. Jeremey sheaths his sword and crouched in front of the Queen, starring through her studying her every detail, the queen does not know what to do, she tries to speak but it seems he doesn’t care what she says, the Queen begins to mime to Jeremy, The queen points to Jeremey then her ears then to herself, Jeremey replies “You haven’t spoken the whole time you’ve been here”, with this information the Queen proceed to pretend to write on her hand, “Guard, bring me something to write with” Jeremey yells. The guard runs into the cell with parchment and a quill, a smile begins to carve its way into the Queen’s face, as she will finally be able to tell her son that she is the Queen, “leave us” Jeremy says to the guard as he leaves for the front of the dungeon, the Queen begins writing, telling Jeremey everything she remembers and that he must help her, the Queen hands the paper to Jeremey, as he begins to read the look on his face begins to show disbelief and anger, but all of a sudden his face changes and tears begin to form in the corner of his eyes as he looks up Jeremey says, “only you would call me Jamie, what happe….” a long blade pierces Jeremey armor and sticks into the ground before him, “I think you’ve heard enough” a mysterous voice says from behind Jeremey.

End Part .

The CUBE-Queen Berry:The Pie is a Lie #2

The CUBE-Queen Berry:The Pie is a Lie #2

Hey, everybody here is part two fo the mystery involving the queen, just to let you know I’m actual having a lot of fun with this.

A splash of cold lands on the Queens’ face, she is awoken by the warmth of her own breath, her body is shocked into life by the appearance of a dark figure before her, with her eyes sight still hazy and everything still out of focus she can bearly make out a single detail of this elusive presence before her. Queen Berry fights all terror and inches closer towards the figure but with every inch the weaker she became, as if some outside force was taking all the energy from her body, her legs were aching, her back was stiff she was frozen with pain but she must know who this figure is. Bang, her forehead hits the bars of the prison cell that until this moment she had completely forgotten about, as the wave of pain subsided the figure begun to speak, “are you ready to talk” it echoed, ” why have you done this to me, I am your queen” she replied. The dark figure begins to pace before the cell staring at the queen, watching her every move, judging her as if this figure was trying ever so hard not to kill her, it begins to move faster and faster, breathing heavier and heavier until out of now where it just stops and thrusts its hand between the bars and grasped the queen by her throat. Queen Bery tries to jump back but with no avail, the figure now had her, it begun to squeeze tighter while screaming questions over and over “Where is she, who are you, how did you get in the throne room” but little did this dark overwhelming force realise that the queen could not hear him, with every second the figure held on the darker everything became, the Queen could do nothing but hold on through the struggle and hope there was going to light on the other side. Just as everything began to fade and the last flicker of light was beginning to fade on the horizon of her gaze, words begin to circle in her mind, grower louder and louder with each syllable becoming clearer than the last, the Queens’ eyes snapped open, everything was no in focus she could see everything from the rust on the bars to the waterways down the hall, the words it was repeating were now coming through as clear as ever ” what have you done with my mother ” it was saying then as the queen looked towards the face of the dark figure it begun to fade. With each moment it became more apparent, the Queens eyes widened and begin to glass over as a wave of tears roll down her face the dark figure had been her son Jeremey all along, in this moment Jeremey stared into the Queens eyes and felt a familiar feeling invade his mind. Jeremey jumps back in terror and begins to run away from the cells pushing the city guard out of the way that had been watching the whole time, Queen Berry reaches for him as he leaves trying ever so hard to grab Jeremey, but alas in this moment the queen is struck with a lightning bolt of terror, for the first time since she had woken the Queen had seen her hands, she begins to scream as she looks towards her body, they had no skin only scales remained, what was once beauty and youth was now something that could only be told in nightmares. Out of nowhere a city guard screams ” shut up monster” and strikes th Queen in the head with the end of his spear, yet again the Queen is inveloped in darkness and floats down into the depths of slumber.


end of part 2.